Tweets and New Run

Social Networking
So I started using Twitter a couple months ago. In one of my classes we talked about Facebook and other social networking sites taking over the world. So I signed up for Twitter ... you know, to contribute to the debilitating internet-reliant problems of our society... and I have made a few updates. Every time I make a twitter update it will show up on sidebar on the right side my blog. For those of you that never go to my blog and only read my email updates, you can check it out here - http://brianjames-livinginperu.blogspot.com/. Also, just for your safety, I promise I won't be too personal.

New Running Route
Last weekend I went running around my new neighborhood. I brought my camera along to take some interesting photos. I wanted to see how long it would take me to run to the shore and back, which, I found out wouldn't be too bad if there wasn't a huge cliff separating the ocean from the city. The fun part is going down... the not-so-fun part is going back up. I'm not complaining - just check out some of the pictures.

Picture 1: I ran into a small pick-up soccer game on the beach. That's right, in Peru and other South American countries they have pick-up soccer games. You can also see the hang gliders up top.

Picture 2: Same soccer game, different angle.
Picture 3: Taking the stairs back up to safety.

Picture 4: A road made of stone leading down to the beach.

For more touristy pictures of the neighborhood, you can check out this website - http://www.mirafloresperu.com/
...or... here - http://www.mirafloreslima.com/

-Brian

Canete

Before I went to The States I went to visit to a small town, Canete, about an hour outside of Lima. I went with Lucia's brother, Francisco, to help build some houses. Really, all of the credit goes to Francisco and his friends. They've been going to this same neighborhood for the past year helping these people live a more healthy and happy life. I was just tagging along to see how many measurements I could screw up or how many of my fingers I could crush while attempting to use a hammer. I'm not exactly well known in the family to have good carpentry or manual labor skills, but I can try.

To get to Canete we took a number of buses. And although I will give Francisco all of the credit for the hard work we did in Canete, I will blame him for one thing - we left Lima at the worst possible time - 7:30pm, the height of rush hour... at the point in the day when you climb into a hot, smelly, damp, and smoggy bus... when your personal space has been invaded and demolished to the point of complete helplessness. If you're a Seinfeld fan, remember the "Close Talker" character and multiply him times 10.
I'm talking about a situation in which you're no longer lucky if you find a seat. No, the people sitting are the people feeling the most discomfort - If the bus arrives at their destination, they don't have enough time to stand up and wade through the crowd of people to get off before the bus has moved onto the next stop. I would definitely compare it to those puzzle-like games that have 8 pieces for 9 spots, one of which is missing, and you have to move the pieces around in a certain order to make the picture. "Wait, you go there, then I go there, then you sir... you go over there, then I climb over your left arm, then you sit there, etc etc". And even worse, if you're sitting down that means that the people who are standing up are at the perfect height to have their butts directly in your face. Trust me, I'm standing up in that situation and I think if you had the choice, you would do the same.

The first couple of buses were simply maneuvering our way through the city. Our second to last bus got us to the main highway - Panamericana. We were literally dropped off on the side of the busiest highway in Peru, at the busiest time of the day. It was not a comforting feeling just standing on the side of the highway waiting for our next ride to come. Francisco saw our bus, which to me looked exactly like all of the others, but he somehow knew this one went south to Canete and the others did not (the Peruvian sixth sense that I have yet to acquire). Luckily, it wasn't too crowded and had two vacant seats for the hour drive from Lima to Canete. When we arrived to Canete Francisco and I stayed the night at a dormitory building inside of a small trade and farming college. It wasn't too bad.

The work: Well, in short, we built little houses for people - Pre-fabricated houses that we simply had to put together safely and securely. The one problem I had was the lack of efficient tools. Nails, hammers, screws, screw-drivers, and possibly a modern level. One of the more difficult aspects of building these houses was making a level floor. The landscape is sand... uneven sand, everywhere. However, the guys had thought of a really clever and make-shift way to level everything. (I'm sure this strategy has been around for years, but I had never seen or heard of it before). They had clear plastic water hoses and they got a bucket of water, siphoned the water through the hose until it was almost full of water... then stood up each end of the hose at two corners of the house so that water wasn't flowing out. If the surface of the water at each end of the hose didn't match flush with the floorboard then we knew it wasn't level. (*by doing a quick read online of the Peace Corps book, "Handbook for Building Homes of Earth" I found that this method is called the Water Hose Method. If you can't tell, I wasn't a boy scout).

Well, simple tasks like nailing the walls to the floor and putting on doors and windows were made a little more difficult due to the rusty nails and the weak hammers. But, that is to be expected when doing these types of things. I spent a good hour trying to make the window frames fit into the empty window space because they were 'off' by a few inches.

Below are a few more pictures from the trip.

This one is the old house and most of the new house side by side.



This one is of the other two members on my team putting on the support beams for the roof.


Here is the main street in this little neighborhood with two donkey pulling a cart/platform, which, I assumed was the public transportation system.

Zack Greinke references don't go over so well in other countries

To my sincere delight I’m back on the blog.

I returned to Peru from a two week North American vacation. Actually, I got back about two weeks ago and have been trying to catch up ever since my plane landed. I arrived in Lima around 11pm on Sunday night, was in my new apartment around midnight, and was off to the first day of work early Monday morning around 6:30am.

My trip home was an incredible time. I saw just about everyone I wanted to see - family, friends, and dog... one of those three didn't remember me. Can you guess which one? (that bastard). Just kidding, I love that dog. Actually, I think he's the best, to the point of extreme bias... when nothing is really his fault. I would compare it to when any parents extremely overestimate the athletic talents of their son or daughter. You're sitting in the stands at your son's soccer, football, or basketball game and the mom or dad behind you won't shut up about how his/her son Jimmy is being recruited by all the big schools. Of course they are forgetting that Jimmy is 12 and only cares about getting the game over with so he can go home and conquer the latest level in the game, Halo.
As for Cosmo - When he peed in my roommate's bed my response was, "Oh, he peed? Where? On your bed? Well, probably because he was scared and hadn't been outside in a really long time." Or when he completely ruined the carpet in my bedroom by tearing it halfway across the bedroom floor - "it was the worst storm of the spring, he was scared". The worst case was when he pooped on Ezra's pillow. I couldn't make excuses for that one. We were all so amazed at how a dog could consciously jump on the bed and desecrate in the one place in which you put your face. Absolutely an unforgettable moment for Cosmo.

Biases aside, seeing my family was special. Even when some of the nights I just sat on my parent's couch and watched The Daily Show and Conan, it still felt good.

What else happened... well... I visited my friend, Jerry, in New York and attended my cousin's baptism in North Kansas City - what did they both have in common... among other things, someone being turned upside down and having water thrown on their head. (that’s a lie, I think).

I got stuck in La Guardia airport because of a bomb threat. I ended up being one of the lucky ones on national TV while waiting in line.

My little brother, Kyle, turned 21. He managed to go from completely sober to "I just need to go home now" in less than 75 minutes. Top notch.

Cash for Clunkers. Who would’ve thought that putting an old truck half-way into a smelly dumpster right in front of your workplace would be smart advertising?

Health Care is either being reformed or killing old people, either way I don't exactly enjoy explaining to Peruvians why the Americans are so angry at the new proposal - "This isn't health reform, this is CONTROL!".


So, in "Peru blog related" news... here is the latest...

The first week back at work was very hectic. The school had an unplanned two extra weeks of vacation due to the swine flu. Not necessarily because there were more cases of the flu at Santa Maria, but it was mandated by the Peruvian school commission (or whatever they call themselves) to take off those days. Both the students and teachers were a little rusty last Monday.

However, one of the more entertaining events of the week, besides my incredibly fun and educational English class, was Santa Maria's version of America's Got Talent. Or, for those of you reading this from Europe, Britain's Got Talent. (in reality, it was more like American Idol, but for this blog’s sake, I will say it was like AGT). And guess who was one of the four judges? Yes, I'm trying not to take so much attention away from the contestants; after all, they are the real reason we're having this contest in the first place. But, really, when you think about it, no one can deny that I am the designated "celebrity judge" to bring in the crowds and berate these young, potentially talented singers until there is some sign of psychological damage. Of course, I’m completely joking and would never hurt these kids. Anyway, I could possibly be considered Santa Maria's version of David Hasselhoff, a title with which I will proudly associate myself. Plus, I'm too much of a pushover to be Piers and I'm obviously too smart to be Sharon Osbourne, so by powers of deduction, I'm David Hasselhoff.

In all seriousness, Wednesday after school the auditorium was packed for the auditions. (packed = 7 people) One by one the students would go on stage and sing. After each performance the judges and I would get on the microphone and give the contestants our critiques. The other 3 judges had some experience in music so their comments were actually legitimate and helpful. Mine, on the other hand, were just sarcastic jokes that none of the students really understood. For example, in response to one of the performances I said, “I was looking for more Saturday Night Live and less Mad TV.” Absolutely no one got that joke… and honestly, its not that funny, but a little recognition would be nice. Below is a list of some other good ones that I was going to say, but after the first one about SNL had miserably flopped I had decided I would just go with more productive comments:

Here are some that I had consciously thought of saying before SNL flop:
- I was expecting the explosiveness of the 2003 Chiefs and you gave me the utterly hopeless 2008 Chiefs. However, in the end, both ended up disappointing so its not that big of a deal.
- Your performance reminded me of that time I was on the airplane coming back from Guatemala. I hadn’t eaten in 15 hours and they were giving out free pretzels. I opened the bag to find only 4 mini pretzels and a few crumbs. You can imagine my disappointment.
- I was expecting Facebook and you gave me Friendster
- The other night about four or five cats got in a huge fight behind my apartment. It was so brutal and loud that they woke me up. I could tell the fight was ruthless; possibly deadly... they were scratching, clawing, biting, hissing, yelping, until it sounded like one of them took a deadly blow and couldn’t recover. For some reason, after hearing your performance I am reminded of that horrible night.
- I needed more Zack Greinke pre all-star break and less Zack Greinke post all-star break. (that one was pushing it).
You get the idea

The following Wednesday we had another round of contestants. Some good, some bad, but all very courageous to get up in front of everyone and sing. Through the faint sound of laughter and jeers from the crowd of immature students, the performing students stood steady and sang with a lot of passion. In the end the judges and I talked about how all of them had a lot of courage to get up there and sing some not-so-masculine songs. I made a point to talk to all of the contestants after their performance (off the record… or, away from the microphone) to congratulate them on their hard work. The elimination stage starts this week. I’ll try to keep you all updated.

I’m working on a couple other blog posts that should be written soon. There’s a lot going on – among them: my new living situation as well as my former landlord whom I would consider the Peruvian John Voight – not for his acting abilities, but for his creepy look and general deviousness. No offense to Jon Voight; his performance in Anaconda was underrated. Also, I have an interesting work visa story from the always-reliable immigration office here in Peru.

Talk to you soon.

-Brian